Saturday, 10 May 2008

• "Wedding Gone Wild" : The Unbridaled Story

  
  Our cliff-side Caribbean wedding is featured in Modern Bride's latest issue.   [photo credit: Tony Yang]

   

  It's pretty exciting to see our wedding in print. Derek and I are delighted that the people at Modern Bride chose to share details of our big day with their readers. (Thanks Holly and Eleni!)

  Just a few words to clear up some details:

  • The timeline of our relationship can be confusing. We started dating in high school in 1998 and graduated in '99 (him) and '00 (me). We went to college in different states so we broke up in '99. When 9/11 struck, we decided to go for the long-distance relationship and got back together in '01. After graduating from college, we both moved to NYC and started living together in '04. Got engaged in '05 and married in '06.
  • The article implies that Derek and I know a thing or two about ballroom dancing. I wish it were true, but sadly, it isn't. At all. 
  • Under the tidbit "Follow a Familiar Pattern," it mentions that the floral design on our ceremony program was based on the embroidery on the chipao that my mother wore at her own wedding reception. This detail was a very sentimental touch for me.

  

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  Unfortunately, Modern Bride was limited to a 2-page spread and couldn't fit in some of my favorite stories or the wilder photos. Fortunately, I happen to have my own personal publishing platform. (Hooray for blogs!) So I'm going to share the inside scoop on the parts of the interview that didn't make it into the magazine spread.

  Wedding Gone Wild : The Unbridaled Story

  MB : The editor really liked that you and Derek had personalized vows and just wanted to get a little more specific about them. It’s completely understandable if you want to keep it personal. But was there at least a theme you would say was most prevalent throughout them (trust, friendship, etc.)?

  

  For our vows, we started with what we loved about each other and our relationship, and ended with our promises on what we would work towards to keep our marriage strong. One of my favorite lines from my vows was "It would take me a lifetime to show you just how much you mean to me, and that's exactly what I vow to do from this day forward."

  

  My favorite part of Derek's vows was when he told me about all the sides of me that he loved. As most women are, I am a very complex and multidimensional woman and he went through all of my sides, from the quirky to the extraordinary to the not-so-pretty. But in the end, he declared that "I love you when you're an angel. And I love you when you're simply human."

  

  It really showed how well he knew me, and how much he truly loved me for me! And that's the part of his vows that got all the girls sobbing... (see arrows above)

  

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  MB : Can you remember other parts of the wedding that were emotional/ memorable and how they made you feel?

  After dinner and dessert, it actually started to rain. At first, I was worried because our wedding was set up outdoors. The resort does have an alternate venue in case of inclement weather, but it would have meant interrupting the party to move the reggae band, the DJ's equipment, etc.

  Well, there was absolutely no need to worry because my crazy guests got up and started dancing in the rain!

  

  I know that wedding traditions like the bouquet and garter tosses are pretty cheesy. But we must run with a cheese-lovin' crowd because we all had so much fun with these events. One of my sisters actually caught the bouquet and did a little victory dance. Both Derek and our friend who caught the garter showed off their seductive crawling techniques as the rest of us howled with laughter.

  

  Of course, who could forget about how our wedding ended up in the pool?!

  It started with the boys tossing the groom in! And then getting pushed in themselves... 

  

  The boys were soon followed by the bridesmaids.

  

  Eventually, the shallow end of the pool became our dance floor! The girls hiked up their dresses, the DJ kept pumping out the beats, and everyone danced with reckless abandon.

  

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  MB : More about jumping in the pool: Did you ever imagine that you and all your guests would dive into a pool with all your clothes on? What did this spontaneous moment mean to you?

  Note: We actually ended up changing out of our wet formalwear and into our bathing suits.

  

  The dancing in the pool wasn't planned at all. The spontaneity of it was exhilarating. Derek and I had tons of fun dancing in the pool with each other and with our friends. Despite the chaos, it was actually very romantic! Afterall, the pool was under the stars and at the edge of a cliff with the Caribbean waves crashing on the other side.

  

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  MB : Were there any interesting interactions/moments with your parents/family?

  One of my favorite moments was actually a very quiet one. Before the big day, my mom had patiently learned how to style my hair and we had a couple of practice sessions together. On the day of, we shared a sweet moment as she got me to relax while she styled my wedding updo with the utmost motherly care.

  

  Derek and I did not plan on having either a Father/daughter dance or a Mother/son dance because it seemed too formal and we didn't want to make our parents uncomfortable with everyone's eyes on them. But during the cocktail hour, there were some people already dancing to the reggae band and my dad pulled me onto the dance floor for a fun number.

  

  Later, after Derek got thrown into the pool, he jokingly approached his parents for a "hug" with his wet clothes on. They avoided the wet hugs, but Derek ended up convincing his mom to join him for a dance instead. So even though we didn't plan on having formal dances with our parents, we ended up having them spontaneously afterall!  

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  MB : In what features of your wedding was the sky blue and mango orange décor incorporated? 

  

  MB : What advice would you give to a bride planning a destination wedding?

  There is a wealth of information on the internet, including free resources and fun communities like Weddingbee.com!

  

  There are no hard and fast rules for destination weddings. Just do what feels right, makes sense, and takes your guests into consideration.

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  Well, the secret's out now. Our wedding totally degenerated into an episode of "Wedding Gone Wild." Classy, eh?

  I couldn't imagine a better way to kick off our marriage than with a fantastically fun celebration with our closest friends and family. Vacation + Vows = Wondrous Weekend

  

  

  It's actually been a year and a half since our wedding. During the interviews with the magazine, I was pleasantly surprised to find that I could still remember that weekend so clearly. Or at least the moments that made me overwhelmed with unbridled joy.

  To be completely honest, most of the details that the article featured were things I had trouble remembering or things of very little importance to me. I had to dig into my files to find out what dishes we chose to serve and what specialty drinks they made at the bar. They devoted several lines to describing our wedding cake flavors and our floral arrangements, but I confessed to the interviewer that I didn't care much about these details and had mostly left them up to our coordinator.

  I can understand why the editor chose to feature those details. They are the most useful to other brides because they are the only things than can be replicated. But one unfortunate consequence of bridal magazines focusing so much on material items is that it gives brides-to-be a wedding-industrial complex.

  For me, the best details at our wedding weren't monogrammed or meticulously arranged. As cheesy as it sounds, the best details were truly the tears, the hugs, and the laughs that Derek and I shared with our loved ones.

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